Sunday, December 30, 2007

The Night I Almost Went To Hell

Some time ago I had a dream. No not a dream, a nightmare. It scared the hell out of me so much that I couldn’t even write it down because I was too scared to think about it. I wish I had written it down because it was the most detailed account of what hell must be like that I could have imagined. Here’s a brief description of it:

In my dream, it was me against three demons. I’m not sure what they were but I knew for sure in my dream that they represented hell. I was standing in the backyard of someone’s house, a friend maybe but that was never really established in my dream. It wasn’t my house, that’s all I know. I was facing the fence shared by the neighbor. On the other side of the fence were the three demons.

How can I explain these demons? My trouble in explaining them comes from the fact that I can’t explain the depth of hatred that they had for me well enough. These demons had so much hatred for me that they blasted their hatred on me like a megaphone would blast sound if it were next to your ear. I felt so much fear that my throat held no voice to scream. I felt the inside of my body trying to run while the outside of my stayed to fight. And God, the smell, the smell of hatred…oh, yes, there is a smell that is indescribable! The smell of hell and hatred is so wretchedly sour, so strong that it burns your eyes and your nose, and grips your throat like two hands choking you with such force as intended to suffocate you, break your neck, pulling the flesh from your spinal cord and draining the life from your body.

The demons were so ugly that calling them demons sounds silly to me, like there should be a name for them that is so much worse, so much more descriptive than demon. They were tall and their skin was hard. Their heads were large. Their teeth were sharp and dripped with a sort of vomit colored liquid that never stopped running out of their hot, steamy mouths. God they hated me. I could feel how much they hated me. That was the scariest part. Feeling the hatred come over me like a thousand thick blankets trying to mop up the clean air around me and saturate my surroundings with hatred.

In my dream, I seemed to have two goals. The first was that I had to somehow find my words because I knew that I couldn’t fight them physically. I knew that I somehow had to find the words “Jesus is Lord”. Now, for those of you who know me, you know that yes, I am a believer…but that is not a sentence that you would hear being yelled from my lips on a regular day. Ha ha. But for some reason, I knew in my dream that that statement was my only defense. The second goal was to not let them over the fence because somehow I knew that the amount of hatred they had for me enabled them to throw my body with such force, such strength, such speed that my flesh would literally rip, stretch and burn from my bones and turn to liquid.

In addition, I knew that their only goal was to throw me. I knew that was how I was to die. They weren’t going to eat me with their huge jaws. They weren’t going to thrash me with their long, long sharp fingernails. They weren’t going to beat me with their scaly hands. They were going to throw me and laugh when my skin ripped off and then they were going to take my soul to hell.

Needless to say, I woke up terrified. Terrified to sleep. Terrified to let myself think about the nightmare. Terrified to breathe for fear that they might hear me and snatch me back into the nightmare.

It totally sucked!

10 comments:

Sweets said...

that's rough... i had a weird nightmare last night... don't even want to think about it, so i know exactly how you're feeling... totally creeped me out!

Isadora said...

Why do you think we don't remember things exactly the way we 'lived' them in the dream? :) I think it is merciful. You don't think it is the Harry Potter books do you?

By the way, I see your reading list - take a peak at this :)

Wishing you and yours in snowy Colorado a wonderful and blessed new year!

Juliana said...

Hi Michelle, Happy New Year

I just posted About Me
Just click, if you want to know me better ^_^;;

Kat Mortensen said...

Michelle, I think your demons hated you so much because you represent so much good that they can't fight. You do good things, think good thoughts and challenge others to do the same. The demons are threatened by you. They want to destroy you because you are a challenger to what they want to accomplish. I've never had a dream like that. I'm not enough of a threat.
Kat

Just been hiding out for a bit...coming back slowly.

Michelle Hix said...

Kat

Hey, I am liking your idea! I was starting to wonder if they knew something I didn't know. But hopefully you are right!

Cocaine Princess said...

I've had a couple of nightmares myself where when I wake up it takes me a few minutes to realize that I was just dreaming. I agree with one comment 'the demons are threatened by you.' Don't be scared to go back to sleep, you seem like such a strong individual.

By the way, thanks for leaving the comment about Lawyer-Guy. So many people think I did go up to the suite with him.

I wanted to wish you a safe and Happy New Year. May 2008 be joyous and filled with love for you and your loved one.

XOXOXOXO,
Cocaine Princess

Michelle Hix said...

Isadora

Love your name by the way! No, definitely not the HP books. This nightmare happened about 9 months ago. I only just read the books this past month. I agree with your comment about it being merciful. Thanks for the link. I will check it out.

Michelle Hix said...

CP

I'm glad you got my comment about LG. I would have not thought any less of you had you gone upstairs...but I have been reading very intuitively into your writing and can tell that you like more control than that (as mentioned).

Anonymous said...

Oh my absolute GOD, what did you eat before bed? Because I'm tossing whatever it was from my house! And I thought my dream last night about my husband sticking a screwdriver into an electrical outlet was bizarro!

Damama T said...

Hey, sweetie. WOW! What a horrible experience. I'm wondering what, around that time, was threatening your safety, or the safety or wellbeing of someone you love.

And I totally agree that your light and love would be a threat to all demondom, and the fact that you KNOW that you can call on God to save you makes them even weaker!

Stay strong, both in character and faith.

xoxo
http://damama2all.blogspot.com/